S01E16 - How to Deal with Intrusive Thoughts

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Hello and welcome back to Carry On with Criselda.  As always, I am so grateful that you have stopped by to join us today.  Be sure to stay till the end for another special, lighthearted message.  And now, a word about my sponsor.

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Alright, let’s get to the nitty gritty.  Intrusive thoughts are those pesky, often disturbing, thoughts that pop into our heads seemingly out of nowhere. They can be about anything, but often center around themes of destructiveness, intimacy, and ethics.

They can be embarrassing and scary and might make us wonder if we're crazy or have some hidden desire to act on them. But the good news is, intrusive thoughts are actually a normal part of being human, and there are ways to manage them.

In this podcast episode, I'll discuss what intrusive thoughts are, why we have them, and how to deal with them. I'll also add a little bit of humor along the way, because let's face it, talking about dark and disturbing thoughts can get a little heavy.

So first, let's define exactly what we're talking about when we say, "intrusive thoughts." These are thoughts that seem to come out of nowhere and are often inappropriate, disturbing, or uncomfortable. They can be about anything. For example, you might suddenly have a thought about pushing someone off a cliff, or having an affair, or stealing something.

It's important to note that having an intrusive thought does not make you a bad person. Just because you have a thought about, say, stealing something, doesn't mean you actually want to do it. It's just a thought. Just like negative thoughts about yourself about how unqualified you are to give a speech when you’ve clearly demonstrated an aptitude in your everyday work, are thoughts not to be relied upon. And while you might have disturbing or embarrassing thoughts, they don’t reflect your true character.

And speaking about embarrassing, have you ever had thoughts such as these?

• "What if I accidentally showed up to work in my pajamas?"
• "What if I started doing the moonwalk in the middle of a job interview?"
• "What if I started singing show tunes in the middle of a crowded grocery store?"
• "What if I accidentally set off all the fire alarms in the office building because I was microwaving fish?"
• "What if I randomly started speaking in a British accent and couldn't stop?"
• "What if I accidentally sent a text to my boss with a typo and it said something totally inappropriate?"

I hope these examples give you a good laugh or a reminder of some funny ones you’ve had! As you can see, intrusive thoughts can sometimes be absurd or ridiculous, which can be frustrating, but it's essential to remember that they're just thoughts and we have the power to choose what we do with them.

So why do we have these thoughts? It's actually a normal part of being human. Our brains are constantly generating thoughts, and sometimes those thoughts can be random or inappropriate. It's like the mental equivalent of a typo. Just because you typed "teh" instead of "the" doesn't mean you're a terrible speller, it just means that your brain made a mistake.

Intrusive thoughts can be triggered by a number of things, including stress, anxiety, and depression. They can also be a symptom of certain mental health conditions, like obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). If you're experiencing a lot of intrusive thoughts and they're causing significant stress or impacting your daily life, it's a good idea to talk to a mental health professional.

So now that we know what intrusive thoughts are and why we have them, let's talk about how to deal with them.

First, it's important to recognize that it's normal to have intrusive thoughts. Like I said earlier, everyone has them. So, if you're having an intrusive thought, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It's just a thought.  And we are not our thoughts.

Next, try to acknowledge the thought and let it pass. This can be easier said than done, but the more you try to fight or suppress an intrusive thought, the more powerful it can become. Instead, try to take a step back and observe the thought as if it's something separate from you. You can even give it a name, like "that annoying thought" or "the weirdo thought." This can help you distance yourself from the thought and not get caught up in it.

Another helpful tip is to practice mindfulness. This means being present in the moment and paying attention to your thoughts and feelings without judgment. This can assist you to become more aware of your thoughts and not get swept up in them.

It can also be helpful to engage in activities that distract you from the thoughts. This could be something creative, like drawing or painting, my personal favorite, or something physical, like going for a run or hitting the gym.

Another supportive tip is to talk to someone about our intrusive thoughts. This could be a friend, a family member, a therapist, or a support group. Sharing our thoughts with someone we trust can help us feel less alone and can provide an opportunity to get some perspective on what we're experiencing.

It's also imperative to take care of ourselves physically. This means getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, and exercising regularly. When we're well-rested and taking care of our bodies, we're better equipped to handle the stress and anxiety that can come with intrusive thoughts.

But it doesn’t stop there.  It’s essential that you also take care of yourself and practice self-compassion. This means being kind to yourself and acknowledging that everyone has thoughts and feelings that they don't always understand. It's okay to have intrusive thoughts and it's okay to not have all the answers.  It’s okay.

One technique that can be helpful for managing intrusive thoughts is called "thought challenging." This involves questioning the thought and examining the evidence for and against it. For example, if you have a thought about being a failure, you might ask yourself, "Is this thought true? What is the evidence for and against it? Are there any other ways I could look at this situation?" This can aid you to see the thought in a more balanced and realistic way.  I have a worksheet that lists some questions to help you determine the validity of any intrusive thoughts, provided by PositivePsychology.com.  I will have it linked for you in the show notes.

It's also helpful to remember that thoughts are just thoughts. They're not facts. Just because you have a thought about something doesn't mean it's true or that you have to act on it.

Another strategy for managing intrusive thoughts is to set aside a specific time to think about them. This can be a designated "worry period," where you allow yourself to think about the thoughts and any related concerns. By setting aside this designated time, you can help prevent the thoughts from taking over your entire day.

It can also be helpful to practice relaxation techniques, like deep breathing or progressive muscle relaxation, when you're feeling overwhelmed by intrusive thoughts. These techniques can help calm your body and mind and make it easier to let go of the thoughts.  For more information on these techniques, I will have a few jpeg images linked for you in the show notes.

It's also necessary to challenge negative thought patterns and try to reframe your thinking. For example, if you're having an intrusive thought about being a failure, try to focus on your strengths and accomplishments instead. This can allow you to see the situation in a more balanced and positive light.

Another helpful tip is to practice gratitude. There it is again. This means focusing on the things in your life that you're thankful for, no matter how small. This can help shift your focus away from negative thoughts and towards the positive aspects of your life.

Equally beneficial is to connect with others and seek support. Sometimes just talking about our intrusive thoughts can assist us in feeling less alone and better able to manage them. Find a friend or family member who you trust and feel comfortable talking to or consider joining a support group where you can connect with others who are going through similar experiences.

So, to sum up, intrusive thoughts are normal, and everyone has them. They can be triggered by stress, anxiety, and other factors, and can be a symptom of certain mental health conditions. The key to dealing with intrusive thoughts is to acknowledge them, let them pass, and practice self-compassion. Techniques like thought challenging, setting aside a designated worry period, practicing relaxation techniques, and challenging negative thought patterns can also be helpful. It's vital to take care of yourself and seek support when needed. If intrusive thoughts are causing significant distress or impacting your daily life, it's a good idea to seek guidance from a therapist.

And remember, a little bit of humor can go a long way in helping to manage those pesky intrusive thoughts. So don't take them too seriously and try to find the humor in the situation.

Thanks for listening to this podcast on intrusive thoughts. I hope you found it helpful and learned some new strategies for dealing with these pesky thoughts.  Until next time, carry on, my friends.  Carry on.

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Good day and welcome to Podcast Minute.  Will this actually be a minute?  Only time will tell.  I’m Cris Elda.  Studies show a statistical rise in polls where voters are raving about the new podcast, Carry On with Criselda, as a show for the thoughtful and emotional.  Cited as the go-to podcast for lighting a fire under its listeners to get their thoughts and emotions under control while gently stroking their ears assuring them that it’s gonna be okay.

Initial confusion over the content of the podcast led some to believe this was going to be about carry-on luggage, while others were perplexed about her Twitter handle, @cowc_podcast, thinking this was a podcast about cows.

Criselda, host of the podcast and self-proclaimed baby Podcaster still in her diapers, oh my, is determined to urge listeners to rate, follow and share with others through a call to action at the closing of every episode in an unconventional, quirky way to rouse listeners to action. I gotta give it to this lady. She's onto something here.

And now here's Crissy with the weather.  Crissy?

[Crissy] It's all sunshine and rainbows here!

Well, that's very positive. 

Now onto sports. 

Oh, this just in. 

We know nothing about sports.  Nothing at all.

And that’s your Podcast Minute.  I’m Cris Elda.

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